What Venting Really Means for You and Your Team

12-03-2025

We’ve all been there — a coworker swings by your desk to unload about an infuriating client, a disorganized project or a tone-deaf manager. You nod, you listen, maybe you offer a few sympathetic words. But when the conversation ends, how do you feel?

A new multi-study investigation published in Personnel Psychology by lead author Allison Gabriel, the Thomas J. Howatt Chair at Purdue’s Daniels School of Business, takes a fresh look at this familiar but under-examined workplace behavior: receiving venting. Most research has focused on the venters — those releasing frustration to feel better. This paper shifts the spotlight to the recipients — the people who absorb that outpouring of emotion and often bear the unseen costs.

The findings hold valuable lessons for both managers and employees seeking healthier, more emotionally intelligent workplaces.

The other side of “letting off steam”

For decades, the dominant view of venting has been cathartic. The idea traces back to Sigmund Freud and Josef Breuer’s “hydraulic model” of anger: If people release built-up frustration, they relieve internal pressure. In theory, venting makes the venter feel better and clears the air.

But Gabriel and her colleagues note that this framework overlooks a key part of the equation — the audience, or recipient, of the venting. When someone vents, the recipient becomes an emotional container for another’s stress. Depending on context, that process can be draining, confusing or even motivating.

Across multiple studies, Gabriel and her colleagues found that venting receipt triggers both maladaptive and adaptive reactions in recipients. On one hand, hearing another person’s distress can create personal distress — a  self-focused emotional reaction marked by anxiety, tension or helplessness. On the other hand, it can also evoke empathy — an other-focused response that may lead to understanding and prosocial behaviors, such as offering help or emotional support. The difference between these two pathways determines whether venting hurts or helps relationships at work.

When venting harms the listener

In many workplaces, venting happens daily and often without awareness of its consequences. But from the recipient’s standpoint, too much exposure to negative emotion can contribute to distress.

Gabriel’s team shows that this distress response often arises through a self-motivated pathway. Recipients imagine themselves in the venter’s position — “that could happen to me” — and begin to feel threatened. In teams where frustration and cynicism spread easily, this process can multiply, creating climates of negativity and burnout. In fact, this distress across studies contributed to the venting recipients doing more direct venting themselves, creating a “venting spiral.”

When venting strengthens connection

Not all venting is bad, and Gabriel and her colleagues found that being a recipient of venting can contribute to people feeling more empathy at work. And under certain conditions — like feeling more similar to one’s coworkers — the relationship between receiving venting at work and empathy is stronger.

In those cases, listening to a coworker’s frustration provides information about their experiences, challenges and needs. Recipients may respond with support — offering advice, covering a shift or simply showing empathy — which can improve trust and teamwork.

Rethinking the culture of venting

The research findings emphasize that venting is a relational event, not a solo act. Every instance affects both the venter and the recipient, shaping the team’s emotional climate.

For individual workers, the message is clear: You can care without carrying. Listening to a coworker’s frustrations doesn’t require absorbing their emotions. At the same time, venting to trusted colleagues can be healthy when it leads to empathy and collective problem-solving. The goal isn’t to suppress emotion but to transform it into understanding and action.

Gabriel urges organizations to rethink how they conceptualize emotional expression at work. Venting is inevitable — humans need to talk about stress — but its impact depends on the surrounding culture. When teams understand both the emotional costs and the potential benefits, they can channel those conversations productively.

So, the next time someone stops by to vent, take a breath. You’re not just hearing a complaint; you’re participating in a complex social exchange that can either erode morale or strengthen connection. The choice lies in how both parties manage the moment.